nutella sex= disaster
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
