i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Randomize
