Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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