he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
