absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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