your room smells of hookers.
And success
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
