420 ftw
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
