Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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