Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize