If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
My dick has a subreddit
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize