Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
