; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize