Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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