Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize