My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i jhust puked up my retainher.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
