How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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