I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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