my shit smells like andre
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
