So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize