But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
ttyl tear gas
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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