All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Who died my cat blue again?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
