Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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