dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
