My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
