We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Girls should come with a carfax report
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
