coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
