New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
