He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
