you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
whose parrot is this?
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I wear drunk well.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
