Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
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