You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
