i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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