so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
