Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
