these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
apparently the secret to your success is patron
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
i think i just lost a toe
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
