I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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