Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize