Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize