So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize