i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
