Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
