So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
