How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
