i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
