The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
