he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
