Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
