Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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