Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
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