That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
