Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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